Contractual Drool Cups & Annuity Diapers: Shootin’ It Straight With Stan

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Welcome to Shooting It Straight with

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Stan. I'm your host, Stan the Annuity

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Man, America's annuity agent, licensed

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in all 50 states in Puerto Rico. I do

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that for Zeke behind the camera because

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he's from Hawaii and he likes when I

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roll my arms right like that. Today's

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topic is is a fun one. It's a slap in

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your face of reality to wake you up to

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where we're headed. And this is called

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contractual drool cups and annuity

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diapers. And you say, "Well, that

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depends." Correct. that's what you're

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going to be wearing. Now, this comes

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from a lifetime of experience in the

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annuity world where I've had clients

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call me every single year and say, "I

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really wish I would have listened to you

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and enjoyed my money because I'd pay you

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a million dollars right now to feel

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good." I've had that call. I've had

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numerous calls like that. The highest

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I've ever had is $10 million to feel

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good, of which I went, "How for how

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long?" [laughter] But I don't want that

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to be you.

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Eight years ago, my father, the great

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Santini, if you've seen that movie,

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please do. If you read that book by Pat

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Conroy, if you haven't, please do. Great

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Santini, not Stantini. That's going to

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be me when I'm old. But the great

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Santini, that was my dad. Hard ass,

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tough, demanded excellence,

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OCD, chewed with his mouth open, drove

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me crazy, yelled at me, pushed me.

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But at the end, that badass was wearing

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a diaper.

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And ever since then, I've reflected on

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that and gone, man. You know, it's all

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going to end up like that if we live

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long enough. I remember seeing I played

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college basketball. My both my parents

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were college basketball coaches, so I

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didn't have a choice. And I remember

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seeing recently before he passed, Bobby

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Knight of Indiana, just a just an ass.

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Just a tough guy to deal with. But at

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the end, it's wearing a diaper.

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So when I talk about contractual drool

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cups and annuity diapers, I'm trying to

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get your attention.

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And chapter two of our lives, it's about

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you. Forget retirement. It's about

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chapter two. Chapter two is you're

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pivoting away from the grind. You're

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pivoting away from accumulation. You've

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won the game. So my question is, why are

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you still playing?

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Because if you live long enough, it

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ain't going to be pretty.

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There's three phases of retirement.

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There's go- go, there's slow go, and

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there's no go. Drool cups and diapers,

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no go. That's where you are. You can't

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go anywhere. You can't do anything. And

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you'd be just as as well off to wipe

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your ass with the money because you

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can't spend it.

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You've heard the person that says, "I

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want my last check to bounce." I get

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that. I'm I'm for that.

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I want you to think like that.

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Annuitities are transfer of risk

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products that suffer four primary

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things: principal, protection, income

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for life, legacy, and long-term care. We

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ask two questions to every single

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person. What do you want the money to

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contractually do? And when do you want

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those contractual guarantees to start?

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From those two answers, I can determine

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A, if you need an annuity. You might

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not. That's okay. Or if B, if you do,

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which one's going to provide the highest

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contractual guarantee and fit your goals

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on what you're trying to do.

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But I'm going to encourage you to go

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live your life. I'm going to encourage

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you to not be obsessed with the IRS. I'm

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going to encourage you to, and you'll

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know when I say this, to to not let Aunt

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Irma

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annoy you.

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Live your life. Learn how to spend

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again. And if you have never learned how

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to spend, teach yourself how to spend.

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I grew up poor. North Carolina, you

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know, college coaches back then didn't

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make that kind the money they make now.

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Okay? And they ended up retiring because

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my dad couldn't take the stress and they

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ended up elementary school teachers to

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this day. I'm like, man, that that's

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that's a tough class with my dad

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teaching it. Okay? I I wouldn't want to

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be in that class, okay? Cuz he I think

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he was teaching math or something and my

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my mom was teaching English. But, you

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know, I grew up poor. My wife for 37

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years, the lovely Christine grew up in a

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trailer in Nebraska. Nothing wrong with

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that. It's just she didn't have any

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money either. And we've had to teach

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ourselves how to actually enjoy things,

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you know, and actually travel and

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actually flag first class because our

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youngest daughter will, okay? And our

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actually our oldest daughter will too.

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But

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annuity drool cups and contractual gear

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contractual diapers or contractual drool

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cups and annuity diapers, however you

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want to phrase it. I want that to stick

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in your head. You know, any I just

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turned 62 and ever since I turned 60,

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it's you kind of you kind of realize

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that clock's ticking and you can

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actually hear the clock. The one that

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really got to me is when we had our

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first grandson and um I held him and I

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just went, "Yeah, you know, my time here

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is limited. It really is." And you know

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that, too, that you're watching this.

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But what I'm telling you is

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live for the day because there's going

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to be a day that we can't live like we

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want to live. We're already I mean, I'm

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already limping around and taking Advil

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and the knees and the ankles are kind of

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shot and the hips hurt and all that

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stuff, but there'll be a time that I

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really can't move. But I want to burn

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the candle. You know, I always say burn

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it at both ends. Boy, what a what a

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beautiful flame that'll be.

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This is almost a pseudo motivational

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speech to you. But I do that to my

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clients now. And you know, I've been

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doing this a long time. We are the top

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distributor out here. I'm very proud of

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what we've built. Sometimes I walk in

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the office in Las Vegas and it's huge

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and I'm like, "Wow, [laughter]

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come a long way." I mean, it's it's it's

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been a great ride. So, the reason I'm

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here now is I like being in front of the

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camera and edutaining you. Edutainment

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enter entertainment education. Um, I

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like doing the videos. I like speaking

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with clients. You can always get me

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stantheanuityman.com if you want to

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speak with me as long as I'm alive and

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breathing um and owning the company,

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which we still do. [snorts] Um, I'd love

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to talk with you and make sure that

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you're going to live your life and not

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just try to not pay taxes or keep the

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same level of um of uh lifestyle. Or

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maybe we can figure out how a way to

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give it away. You know, we're trying to

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give give money away just like a lot of

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you are as well. You know, gifting it to

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families and, you know, buying them

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things that we probably wouldn't buy.

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And I want you to think of this, too. It

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just hit me that a lot of you are

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sitting on a lot of money and you

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probably have, you know, young young

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family people in your life. They need

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the money now. They don't need it when

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you die. They need it now. Consider

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starting to give that money away.

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guy called me the other day and he goes,

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"Hey, um, what's the gifting amount?" I

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said, "I think it's probably around 20

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grand you can give to anybody." He goes,

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"Should I buy another MA?" And I knew

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the guys, he's a good client. Should I

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buy another MA? Start just start gifting

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the money away instead of buying a MA

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every year from you. And I said, "Well,

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let's go back over your your portfolio."

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We did. I said, "Start gifting it away."

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Now, he had no debt. Just start gifting

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it away. Start giving it away. start

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volunteering, start doing those things

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because, you know, eventually we'll all

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have, you know, be using a drill cup and

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crap in our pants. And that sounds

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harsh, but I I'm do that to get your

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attention. Okay? I do that because I'm

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probably in the same boat with you,

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looking at longevity for myself, how

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long I'm going to live, setting things

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up for my family, making sure they're

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taken care of. I've won the game. I've

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decided to still play to help everybody

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and help people and because I enjoy it

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and this is all I do. Then I can't

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imagine trying trying to sit around and

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play guitar all day because I'm marginal

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at that. But uh I can play three power

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chords. That's pretty good.

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But this was this this topic hit me. I

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thought it was important to talk about.

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I said it on a video just out of the

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blue the other day and people just

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freaked out. They said, "Did you just

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say drool cups and crap in your pants?"

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Of course, I answered with depends.

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[laughter] Which a guy told me the other

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day, "Please stop using that joke." Hey,

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that's a good joke. You know, that's

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that's a really good joke.

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Annuities are contractual guarantees.

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You buy them for what they will do, not

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what they might do.

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You put them in the portfolio for either

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principal protection, lifetime income,

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legacy, or long-term care. That's what

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they're for.

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They're also for peace of mind, and

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they're also for lifestyle. In chapter

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2,

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great story. And I'll end with this.

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guy calls me the other day and he goes

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he goes I said well you know how's it

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going? He goes good. You know we're

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doing blah blah blah and we set up the

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income floor for him with uh some

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deferred income annuities and some

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income writers. He said man I'm doing

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good. He goes my wife's driving me crazy

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because she wants to tear out this

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perfectly good kitchen and tear out the

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marble and redo it.

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He goes perfectly good marble stand. I

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don't know what they I said out the damn

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kitchen. Give her the kitchen. She's put

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up with your ass for all these years.

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Give her the kitchen. You can afford the

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kitchen. If it's going to make her

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happy, give her the kitchen. He's like,

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"Well, that's just not prudent." I

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don't, you know, I don't care. I don't

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care if it's prudent.

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Live your life.

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Enjoy your life because we know where

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we're going to end up. I don't have to

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repeat it again. You're visualizing

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yourself, right?

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Only thing I'm going to say, Zeke,

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behind the camera, is that if I'm going

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to do a like a diaper, I'm like 85. Can

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you imagine me at 85? That'll be That'll

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be crazy. I'll still be doing videos,

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but the diaper will have my logo on it.

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You can guarantee that. That's shooting

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it straight with Stan.